Being in love doesn’t guarantee that one would be an expert when it comes to relationship. I guess the only thing we can master is the art of knowing when to hang on and when to let go.

As in this case of me. Time indeed was my best friend. Despite some little argument, the fights are not lingering. We’re civil, sometimes even friendly. There will be times when the laughter reminds me of the way we were once in relationship- CAREFREE AND HAPPY. But that’s not to say I’ve forgotten all the bad things that happened. Once you find it in your heart to forgive, the bad things just become a faded memory.

A friend was right in saying “as we grow up, we learn the one that wasn’t supposed to ever let you down probably will. You will have your heart broken probably more than once and it’s hard. But you’ll break hearts too, so remember how it felt when yours was broken. You’ll fight with your best friend. You’ll blame a new love for things an old one did. Time is passing too fast and eventually you’ll lose someone you love. So take many pictures, laugh much and love like you’ve never been hurt because every 60 seconds you spend upset a minute of happiness you’ll never get back. There are times when even the best of us having trouble with commitment and we maybe surprise at the commitment we are willing to let slip out of grasp. We may surprise ourselves by the commitment we’re willing to make. True commitments take efforts and sacrifice which is why we have to choose our commitment very careful.”

Failed relationship isn’t guarantee you’ll never be affected again. Having your heart broken by someone you love is never an easy thing. But once you learn to cope with the hurt, the pain never stays long.

My heart still bleeds but the sadness doesn’t flow as much like before. I’m sure I’m able to survive.

Things are not really okay yet, but I’m healing. So how do I keep the music playing? I decide to fall in love with life. I should fall in love with life. I’m in love with the life I have and everything that is part of my existence.

I don’t regret for what went wrong with my relationship as long as my love life is concerned. It was thrilling while it lasted. I read somewhere, “love is emotion and romance is an evocative expression. I need and want love, but our constant craving is for romance. If love is a dance, romance is tango.”

The beautiful music has ended. It’s just an instrumental melody. So if friends ask me about whatever happened, I’ll tell them “we’re friends now. Best friend.”

So, while the songs still bring that certain glow, I should carry on. I guess it’s just one of those phases in life. It can be sweet at one point and it can be bitter at another point. Bitter doesn’t always taste bad. There’s a pleasant sort of bitterness like bittersweet chocolate. Like me, there are days when I crave for Colletto and Haagen Dasz ice creams. But too many sweets give me toothache. Hahahaha…

Folks, this is my dark chocolate phase, and I’ll enjoy every single second of it.

I REMEMBER YOU. ALWAYS

This post isn't written by me. I just quote it.

"Kamu kudoakan, kamu kuikhlaskan. I bid thee farewell, my friend. May you find what you seek, may you remember me well, and may you treasure the memories we’ve had."

No way November will see our goodbye

When it comes to December it's obvious why

No one wants to be alone

And come January I'm frozen inside

Making new resolutions a hundred times

I try to stop believing in love. Then, I somewhat try to believe in the same thing called love. So many times till I ended up in bruises and still calling myself as happy. Love supposed to be a happy thing. Yet, it never was.

I don't know if I still want to believe in love, ever again. Love comes and goes. When one stays, it always sing the wrong tunes. Awkward. And I've had enough singing awkward rhymes in my life.

I'm a bad songwriter, yet, I've always tried to make one beautiful perfect song, full length. But my songs are always left undone.

No one would fit into me. And guess what, one could never change. ME.

Let all this feeling evaporates
For words are somewhat unforgiving
I might lose my heartbeat

I'm tired of trying to prove that I have love
Let it shine without me
From this moment on

Convince me if I'm worth of it. If you can't, I'm sorry, LOVE, I'm letting you go

Waktu itu. Ketika waktu itu ada. Aku tidak tahu kalau kamu ada. Entah kenapa secara perlahan2, aku baru menyadari bahwa kamu itu ada di sudut ruang itu. Tapi entah kenapa pula aku tidak terganggu dengan keberadaanmu.

Ketika kemudian mulai kurasakan duka karena kamu tidak ada. Mungkin aku mulai panik dan tidak bersedia untuk merasakan itu. Namun satu yang pasti, terlalu banyak hal yang menyangkut dirimu...

Aku terluka ketika kamu terluka. Aku pun berduka ketika wajahmu tak bercahaya.
Dan entah sampai kapan pila hal itu akan tetap ada, walaupun rasanya tidak harus begitu.

P.S:
Telah kubuka pintu hatiku sebesar2nya. Tapi ternyata itu tidak cukup.