Tuesday, May 8, 2007

I’m working on my abs and build my 6 packs again. To gain it, I should have my diet. Gosh…it’s hard. But I wanna work on my diet program again. I’ve been doing a lot of yoyo diets, which I hate so much. The motivation, that's it. It keeps going on and off and on and off, hehehhehe... Well, gotta start making a commitment with myself. I wanna live much healthier and I just wanna be more focused and a lot happier than now. And I just need to force myself to keep having those positive thoughts about everything. I won't have bad thoughts towards other people, whoever they are, uh-uh, and I just gotta stop it. Is it gonna kill the criticism or the sarcasm I have? hehehehhehe, of course not. I may be planning to be a better and healthier person in both mind and body, but I also still need to be aware of all the good and bad things that might happen all the way, coz things just sort of happen, things happen just like how they want to.

I also gotta stop being an almost-professional procrastinator. But I just can't let it keep going and turn into this evil thing that can transform into the most dangerous form: LAZINESS. It’s a dissertation that I’m dealing with over here. Halloo? Can I just yell it to brain in my head?? hehehhe.. Man, do I sound desperate or what? but I really need to get this over with, A.S.A.P, for the sake of my life, so I can continue working again, so I can go to see the world, so I can make my family happy, so I can celebrate it together with my beloved friends if I make it.. If... Oh my God, do I doubt myself now? hehehehee..

Never sweat the small stuff ever again. I’m gonna set a much higher price for my sweat now, ain't gonna spill it that easy. I’m gonna bury my angst, the anger, the hatred-to-be, the sadness... I’m gonna bury it twelve feet under. I have to learn to forgive and forget. Yes, I won't stick to that tagline ever again, "forgiven but not forgotten"... No, it's only gonna create a time bomb inside me. I just need to forget. I need to repent, to have my own kinda way of redemption; I need to create this powerful cleanser formula for myself, to get rid of those evil aura, invisible debris and dirt all over me.

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